Usually anyone who owns a dog calls his dog something like Rover, Spot or Rex. Well called mine Sex.
Well, Sex can be a very embarrassing name as you will see.
Please let me share some adventures with you.
One day when I took Sex for a walk he ran away from me.
I spent hours looking for that dog. A police officer came along and asked me what I was doing in an alley at 4 am in the morning. I said, “I’m looking for Sex.” My case comes up next Tuesday.
When I went to the Town Hall to get a dog License, for Sex the Clerk asked me what I wanted so I told him a license for Sex and he said he would like to have one too. When I said, “but this is a dog” he said he did not care what she looked like. I said. “You don’t understand, I’ve had Sex since I was 2 years old.” He replied, “You must have been a strong boy!”
When I decided to get married I told the minister that we wanted to have Sex at the wedding. He told me we would have to wait until after the ceremony. I said.
“But Sex has played a big part in my life, and my whole life revolves around Sex.” He said “he did not want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church.” I told him everyone coming to the wedding, would enjoy having Sex there.
The next day a justice of the peace married us and my family is now barred from the Church.
My wife and I took the dog along with us on our Honeymoon. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. The clerk said that every room in this hotel is for sex. So I said, “You don’t understand, Sex keeps me awake at night.”
The clerk said me too.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said “Your honour, I had Sex before I was married” and the judge said “me too.” When I told him that after I was married, Sex had left me he said “me too.”
Well now I have been thrown in jail, married, divorced and have had more damn troubles than I ever bargained for with that damn dog. Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the Psychiatrist. She asked me “what seems to be the trouble”? I replied, “well Sex has died and left my life and it’s like losing a best friend and it’s so lonely.” The doctor looked at me and said. “Mister you and I both know that Sex isn’t a man’s best friend so get yourself a DOG.”